So I told you how Grandpa Smedry showed up at my house and said “Alcatraz, come with me to save the world!” (That totally happened. You read the first two books, right?) Well, this is the book where you find out how awesome I really am! I finally make it to the Free Kingdoms—lands outside of evil Librarian control (like where you live)—and there’s a bunch of castles! And dragons! And a giant crystal mushroom where knights hang out! And a huge pig butt you can ride in! (Okay, that’s exactly as not-cool as it sounds.) Plus everyone loves me there because I’m a celebrity! (Don’t worry, I won’t let that go to my head.)

Anyway, some bigwigs from the evil Librarians are in town trying to negotiate a peace treaty—and I don’t believe for a second that they actually mean it. I hope I can convince the Council of Kings it’s a terrible idea. Also, Bastille is in big trouble with the Knights of Crystallia because I broke her magic sword (whoops), but if I explain what happened they’ll let her be a full knight again, right? They’d better, or I might break something else important! (Err, knowing me, that’s bound to happen anyway...)